The case of Alix Skeel and Jordan Worth has highlighted the fact that anyone can be a victim of domestic abuse - regardless of gender
This week, 22-year-old Jordan Worth became the first woman to be convicted of domestic abuse under the UK’s new coercive control laws.
Jordan – who has been has been jailed for seven-and-a-half years – subjected her ex-boyfriend, Alix Skeel, to horrific mental and physical abuse during the course of their six-year relationship.
Now Alix has bravely waived his right anonymity in the hopes of helping other people (particularly young men), escape abusive relationships.
Talking about the abuse he suffered, Alix revealed: “It was three years of mental abuse and then it turned physical.
“I had open burns. I went from 10st down to seven… the hospital told me I was 10 days away from death.”
The high-profile nature of this case has shone a light on male victims of domestic violence.
If you want to find out more about the subject, think you know a man who might be being abused, or are in an abusive relationship yourself – read on below…
NOTE: The following information has all come from the male domestic abuse charity ManKind
Male domestic abuse: The statistics
- 15% of men aged 16-59 have experience some form of domestic abuse
- 1/3 of domestic abuse victims are male
- It generally younger men who fall victim to partner abuse
- Gay or bi-sexual men who suffer domestic abuse is nearly double that of heterosexual men
- 13% of men who are rough sleepers are doing so as a result of partner abuse
- One in four victims of revenge porn are male
- Male victims are over three times more likely to keep their abuse secret compared to females
Forms domestic abuse
- Physical abuse – Kicking/punching/hitting with bare hands or weapons
- Isolation – Limiting outside involvement of or contact from friends and family
- Verbal abuse – Constant shouting/yelling, verbal humiliation
- Threatening behavior - Using the constant threat of violent or negative consequences to control behavior
- Emotional and Phycological abuse - Intimidation, verbal humiliation, keeping someone from sleeping/eating, constant contact e.g. stalking
- Power and control – Using force to control behavior, not accepting responsibility for abusive behavior
- Financial Abuse – Totally controlling the family income, not allowing the victim to spend money unless permitted, getting the victim into debt
- Sexual Abuse – Sexual harassment/pressure, forcing sex after physical assaults, sexually degrading language, rape
- False allegations – Using false scenarios where the victim is the abuser or guilty of other crimes to control behaviour
Signs someone might be a victim of domestic abuse
- Changes in behaviour/demeanour
- Changes in physical appearance e.g. substantial weight lose
- Changes in contact pattern
- Changes in work behavior
- Seems anxious to please their partner
- Go along with everything their partner says and does
- Check in often with their partner to report where they are and what they’re doing
- Receive frequent, harassing phone calls from their partner
- Talk about their partner’s temper, jealousy, or possessiveness
- Have very low self-esteem, even if they used to be confident
- Show major personality changes (an outgoing person becomes withdrawn)
- Be depressed, anxious, or suicidal
- Take up, or, increase drink or drugs usage
What to do if you are in an abusive relationship
- Leave the relationship if you can
- Keep a diary and tell someone you trust, if you can
- Keep important documents to hand
- Report incidents to a GP
- Contact police and ensure details are logged - make sure you get a crime reference number
- Do not retaliate
Where to go for help
Charities such as the Mankind Initiative, Men's Advice Line, Refuge, Respect and Reducing The Risk all offer resources and help for victims of domestic abuse.
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